This is usually how it goes
Alex: Hello Sam
Sam: Hello Alex, how are you ?
Alex: I am good, how are you ?
Sam: I am good, its nice weather we are having today.
Alex: Yes it is, lets hope it stays like this.
Sam: See on the news now the towns got flooded ?
Alex: Yes that was terrible, my niece was going to go over there this weekend.
Sam: Oh wow.
Alex: her and her husband visited a nice cafe up there that have the most delightful cakes with the yellow cream in the middle.
Sam: oh yes I have been there, they are nice, I liked the Banana Bread they make, it is so wonderful.
Alex: oh yes, we purchased two loaves last time we were up there, one for us and one for our nephews children, they loved them.
Sam: I had better be heading off, it truly has been wonderful catching up with you.
Alex: it is truly a delight catching up with you again, bye for now.
Alex: bye.
Sam: bye.
Story and conversation ends and nothing much done except they met and spoke a few meaningless words.
Did Alex know about the burden of debt Sam is under and under financial stress and may loose their house ?
Did Sam know about Alex car problem and is about to loose their source of income because they can not get to work because they do not have a car any more ?
Did Alex know Sam is self employed and their business is growing and needs more employees ?
Did Sam know Alex buys and sells and repairs cars ?
Did Alex know Sam is a panel beater / motor mechanic ?
If these 2 had a real conversation, then they could possibly help out and complement one another in their needs.
All too often people when they gather to meet talk about the superficial unimportant and mundane and meaningless things, the weather, the sport, the tv show, politics, CRT and woke and gender realignment in schools, etc.
But many times they fail to see the needs of those we encounter, and more times than not, even one’s own self never reveals their true feeling and wants and needs.
Imagine a conversation that went like this.
Alex: Hello Sam
Sam: Hello Alex, how are you ?
Alex: I am good, how are you ?
Sam: I have had a splitting headache all day, my partner left with the milk delivery person, my child is down with some severe reaction after getting a shot. I am a month and a half behind in the rent and the land lord is threatening to kick us out of home, I have not slept in 2 days. The cat is vomiting all over the house and the vet bill for the dog was $750, the hot water service broke down, and there is a water leak in the roof and next doors Doberman dog is always digging a large hole under the fence and ruining our vegetable garden. we are a month behind in paying the car registration and I can not afford to pay the insurance for the car, and my house is empty of food and I have 2 hungry children wanting something to eat.
Could you imagine the response from Alex ? More than likely Alex will turn around, look another direction and leave to talk to someone else.
Most people do not really care, and do not want to know any of your real issues when they ask “how are you ?” the “how are you” is only used as a greeting “hello”.
But Imagine someone asking you something completely different.
Imagine someone only wanted to ask you 2 questions, and only wanted to hear truthful answers.
Though these 2 questions are unlike any other 2 questions, and they are dangerous questions which would involve you stepping out of your comfort zone. It may actually involve you doing something completely disruptive and outside your normal comfort zone.
You should never ask these questions unless you are prepared to commit to this man or woman and get real time life altering physical involvement outside your normal routine.
This would involve some serious internal soul searching from yourself to see if you are willing and capable of such a commitment.
Because these 2 dangerous questions are as follows.
Jamie: Hello Blake
Blake: Hello Jamie.
Jamie: Blake, if money was no object in your way, If location or resources was not an issue, What would you most want in life ? what is your inner most desire to have or do or achieve in life ? If there was nothing holding you back, what would be the one thing you would really like to see happen or do in your life ? If there was nothing restricting you from achieving that desire goal of your life ? What would that one thing be that you would like to do or have or achieve in life ?
Blake: Oh, thats a bit unusual. I would have to think about that one, perhaps a have a small cafe in a remote town village selling cafe things and selling locally made items and souvenirs. That would be my dream living my life content.
Jamie: Blake, what can I do in order to help you achieve that goal for you ?
Every Blake is different, every Jamie is different. Everyone has different goals, everyone may have different ways in order to assisting someone.
Someone may want to be a painter, someone may want to start up a new business, someone may want to catch up on a friend they have not seen in years, someone may want to travel over seas, someone may want to visit their elderly parents while they still alive, others may want to live in a different suburb, etc. The list of possibilities is almost endless.
Everyone’s Jamie would be different, some would be able to directly help, eg, your version of Jamie might be a Paint and art Deco shop owner and the individual with the dream may want to open up their own art studio, so it would be perfect ideal match.
Other scenario maybe could be someone wants to run a small country cafe and the other knows a small country town shop that is for sale / for lease. Or someone wants to be a mechanic, and the other knows a friend who is looking to take on apprenticeships.
Or it could be someone who wants to start selling cupcakes for a living, and the other has no idea, but they would share the word around about the one who is wanting to sell cupcakes, and someone they speak to, or someone they spoke to speaks to them, and they are able to assist them.
So
Think about your inner most desire, think about that one thing in your life you wish for an desire so much, that deep inner secret desire you have told nobody about. If you could get that one thing that you would love and desire most in life, that one thing that regardless of money or status or ability etc, what would be that one thing that you would most like and desire in this life ? What would that one thing be ?
And how can I help you achieve that goal for you ?